2024 - A Recap

As the years increasingly do, this one passed in a blur - though we had a lot to show for it.

January and February were routine, mostly.   Martha made a trip in February to visit her mother and Patrick went to Nicaragua to chill out.  Along with friends Gaye Warner and her sister, Ginger, we bopped over to Norfolk to see a Paul McCartney photo exhibit.   Nathan was still out in Washington working at Mt. Baker, a ski resort. And we dragged Patrick with us to VMFA (Virginia Museum of Fine Arts) to see a samurai exhibit.

In the lull of winter, we had our front room/den painted and drapes made.  Now an elegant, cozy refuge.

In March and April we made a big three-week-plus trip to Europe.   London, Croatia, Slovenia and Vienna - described in another post.

In May we attended Emmy and Ellis's wedding in which Chris was Best Man.  Patrick joined us.  Hot day at a private venue out near Roanoke.  Chris did a marvelous job.

On our way out to Michigan in June we first stopped in D.C. for a Monocle reunion of the Dixon crowd - and stayed that night with Maria Petaros.    We were heading to Michigan for another wedding, Katie Dahlman, my brother Jack's daughter.  She conveniently had the event in Grand Rapids, which happens to be a short drive from Holland and Castle Park.   Once there it was jumping from one place to the next…..a couple days in Castle Park…..then a house-sit in Chicago….then visiting the Smiths in Indiana….then back to Castle Park, where we stayed at my brother-in-law, John Clarke's, cottage.  

While we were doing the Chicago house-sit Martha's mother unexpectedly passed away.   She was 102 and had been in a nursing home for 15 months.  She wasn't suffering from any serious illness.   Just slipped away in her sleep.   I woke up in our house-sit hearing Martha consoling her sister and figured it out pretty quickly.   We had just taken her out to lunch two days before.   And the day prior Martha visited with her while I had joined my sister's family and my aunt for a brunch in Glenview to say goodbye to niece Kelly and her husband, Justin, as they left to live in Switzerland.  (It was, unfortunately, another self-indulgent-fest that I found frustrating.)   Martha and I went to the nursing home to coordinate the collection of Cathy's body and clean out her room.  It was the fourth - and obviously final - time that I'd moved Cathy; family home to condo to independent living and to nursing home - belongings gradually shrinking each time. Jarring to realize it's the path we all might trod.

Back in Castle Park we had another wedding to attend; Ted Parker and his partner, Joe.  It was an extravaganza with dinners, a reception in the field with tent, full meal and band.   Over the top, but good fun.   All the while we stayed at John Clarke's and had to navigate some of our cottage issues with Betsy and her family.  These are always tense because of Betsy's eccentricities and her family's dysfunction.   We struggle to fix the cottage and keep up with maintenance only to find that its been trashed or neglected by her family.   The prospect that we have to keep picking up after them in the years to come is infuriating.   It was made worse this time with a visit by Martha & Betsy's cousin, Wendy, and her daughter, Madigan.   Betsy invited them to Castle Park on the premise of a family reunion….but then ignored them while there (?!)  We were left keeping them company and Betsy's daughters even dumped their children on Madigan to baby-sit while they went in town to play.   Asking a guest to baby-sit??!!   Self-centered, rude and clueless.

While there, Martha, Betsy and John had to go through Cathy's belongings, particularly her paintings, some of which are valuable.  Eventually, we would take several of them back to Richmond with us.

We were glad to head back to Virginia.  All the while we'd also been worried about Nathan.  He'd had a rough breakup with his longtime girlfriend, Katrina (which broke our hearts), and was now on a commercial salmon fishing ship in Alaska for the summer.  Grueling, long work, but he was doing it for the pay.

In early July we were invited to the Ferguson's - old NOVA friends - at their summer place in Duck, North Carolina.  We were joined by joint friends, Rob & Christina, and the six of us had a delightful time….going to the beach…..dining out….pickleball....as well as ice cream and beer stops (not at once).   It was un-godly hot, though.  We got to know the Fergusons in our early years in Lowes Island since they also have four boys close in age to our own.   I enjoy Jeff because he's a man after my own heart.   Loves to take on projects and is very resourceful, building decks, cabinetry, etc.  But also loves to read and has taken up artistic painting, as I have.

Filling time in between trips, I took on a project back home - painting doors black! And getting to the gym as often as I could.

The rest of July we stayed in steamy Richmond, then headed back to Michigan on August 2 for an extended stay.  It was marred quickly with the sudden death of a dear, old childhood friend, Bob Allen.   His memorial service was put together quickly and I made the drive over to Chicago from Holland for it.   I'd grown distant from Bob in recent years, owing to his political wackiness, but we were close friends over many years and the memories came flooding back.  It was good to see a few old friends and catch up, as well.   Joined Dan and Lynn Van Schindel for a breakfast and saw Scott O'Conner at Sue's Allen's house before heading back to CP.

Back in Castle Park, it was our own time in the cottage without the disruption and anxiety of Betsy's family and ended up staying until mid-October.  Two and half months.   We promptly cleaned and put everything in order, organizing the essentials of life and routine.   We also set about making improvements to the place (again, which we routinely do and Betsy's family does not).   Martha arranged professional cleaners, having the roof cleaned, getting an energy audit, having a fire prevention inspection, organizing closets and drawers and weeding/cleaning the foliage up the steps.  

I tore down the old garbage can enclosure, filled in the perimeter with decorative stones, replaced broken lighting fixtures, replaced the storage door lock and repaired the dining room table (Betsy's kids), and in an ultimately pointless exercise, painted the entire kitchen, including cabinets that I'd disassembled, sanded and repainted.   Which generated another episode with Betsy on the cabinet knobs (ugh!).  Right afterwards we decided to completely rehab the kitchen, so I'd wasted my time.

The paradigm of Castle Park has completely changed.   Over the past few years as Cathy faded, it became more Martha & Betsy's to manage and use.  Now, with Cathy gone, it's free and clear for them to make up the rules; including hosting guests, which we never could under Cathy's reign.   So Patrick invited some of his college music friends up for a few days - who were wonderful to spend time with.   I rented a pontoon boat and took them out for a cruise on Lake Michigan over to Saugatuck.   

Then Martha hosted a group of her college friends who flew in from North Carolina.  Because of flight snafus, I had to pick them up in Grand Rapids.  As soon as they got in the car they wanted to hit a dispensary! (not legal in NC, but everywhere in MI).   I handed them a Mason jar of home-grown I'd gotten from Bob Allen's that made them happy.  

Finally making the drive back to Richmond in mid-October, we were anxious to get home and see our cats - who'd been tended by Gaye and Ginger while we were in Michigan. 

As soon as we got back, Jamie came up from Buenos Aires for a month to stay with us. While here, he painted a piece in our garage that was then auctioned off at a benfit for over $800. Not too bad.

Ever looking for outings, Martha arranged for Chris and Patrick to join us for brunch at a diner followed by an exhibit at the VA Museum of Fine Arts.    It's so nice having them live close by and willing to join their old parents for these excursions. 

In early December we made a one-night trip up to D.C., staying at a hotel on the Wharf.   I'd gotten tickets and a VIP session to see a band - Pineapple Thief - featuring Gavin Harrison, a drummer I admire.   Martha took the time to visit her friends Abbie Littlejohn and Margo McFarland in NW.   The next day we had a wonderful brunch at an Asian restaurant - along with DOT Secretary Pete Buttigieg dining a few tables down.

A quirky excursion Martha booked was a nighttime visit to the "President's Heads."   They were a bunch of enormous sculptures that had been made in the 90s as a tourist attraction and had slowly been shifted about until they ended up in a benefactor's lot.   It was cold and after touring them we listened to two guys give us chat/presentation.  Again, quirky.

Over the last months of the year we also took on projects to upgrade our Richmond home.   Improving and upgrading is just part of our joint DNA.   We had our clothes closets redone.   Had the downstairs doors painted black (to match my upstairs set).   Set up picture lights for several of our paintings….piano tuning, etc.

The final months of the year also marked some important financial changes.  In a move I'm still not sure about, I turned over management of our portfolio to Fidelity.   I'm tracking it and may rescind that control, but right now it's a leap of faith under the assumption that they have more expertise than I do. We'll see.  In addition, I finally arranged for a Long-Term Care insurance policy.   This is usually a judgement call, but I had a life insurance policy I no longer needed and could convert it into a LTC policy without tax liability.   With that base covered, most of our financial plans are on auto-pilot.

Ending the year at Christmas was joyful; with Jamie in from Buenos Aires (again) and Nathan in from Washington - where he was working at the ski resort - again.   All four boys --  and the six of us had a delightful time together; even got the three brothers to Patrick's church on Xmas Eve where he led the choir and performed on the massive organ.

Not quite as productive as I would prefer, but all in all, a pretty full year.